See, I am a messed up cookie trying to be a perfect one. I have lived the majority of my life trying to present a pretty and perfect self to the world. I strive to look
The amazing thing is....God is not surprised about my broken and messed up places. And even more amazing...those broken places and messed up areas He wants to use for His glory. Did you see all the I statements? I really am all of those things. But Jesus is more! I am not perfect or sinless or without mistakes, but Jesus is. I do not have it all together, but Jesus is directing my steps and is making all things work together for good. I am afraid, but the Bible tells us that He has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and sound judgement. I feel insecure, but my place is secure in Christ. I am a co heir with him, and I am firmly held with in the Father's hand. I feel insufficient, but He says His grace is sufficient. When I feel inadequate, He says my adequacy comes only from Him.
I am reminded of the woman in Mark 14:3. Do you remember the story? See Jesus was at Simon the Leper's house reclining at a table when this unnamed woman comes to him with an alabaster jar of pure oil of nard. An expensive jar of fragrant oil believed to be worth about one year's wages. She brings in this jar, breaks it open and anoints Jesus's head with the oil inside. She had to break the jar for the fragrance and the oil to be released. Did you get that? The jar had to be......broken. We could even say that until the jar was broken, the oil was useless.
I am learning that I need not be afraid to be broken. I don't need to fear my mistakes. And, most importantly, I need to let others see the mess. Jesus is not looking for a beautiful alabaster jar to sit on a shelf. He is looking for a broken mess, that is bathed in His grace. Then, the sweet fragrance of a transformed life is released into this lost world.
You know as well as I do, broken cookies taste just as good as perfect ones. And now, I think they may taste even better. Because I know Jesus can use a broken life much more than he can use a perfect one.